This is My Yoga

Friday morning I attended a candlelight vinyasa class focused on gratitude and heart opening. I was on my last day of an 8 day trip to visit my oldest two who are away at college. The class was beautifully choreographed, the playlist featured several songs from Kanye's new album, the room was crowded (but in the best kind of way), people were quiet, the heat was set at 90' and it was just what I needed.

This is my yoga.

Inhale. Exhale.

This is my yoga.

On my mat I set my intention, I pause, I breathe, I relax, I find my edge, I push myself, I let go, I rest, find alignment, experience peace, and then I repeat it all again and again and again.

This is my yoga.

When we started making plans for this trip our INTENTION was for our little family to all be together. I was going to head down early with the three youngest and Dusty would catch a flight for a couple of days and join us on Thanksgiving. Our INTENTION was good but right away we ran into obstacles.

My son had his first game the week of Thanksgiving which meant he couldn't drive down with me. No problem, the girls and I found a cheap flight and the guys could travel together.

Then there was practices that couldn't be missed.

Change of plans, maybe the guys won't come.

I set a new intention, this would be about the girls and I spending time with the oldest two and the boys bonding over basketball and food. I made peace with the situation.

Dusty has been battling digestive issues and was finally able to get the gall bladder removal surgery scheduled, the day before Thanksgiving.

I panicked. I tried to cancel our trip.

Dusty put his foot down (which doesn't happen often) and sent us on our way.

The trip was beautiful and hard.

There was a lot going on at home, and a lot going on in all my children's lives.

I (like so many of you) wear a lot of hats. I juggle. I fail. I miss things.

Back to my mat.

Friday morning I was feeling more raw than normal- I live in a sea of feelings so that's saying a lot!

I felt discombobulated.

The room was quiet and dark. We started to focus on our breath. Inhale. Exhale. The tears started rolling down my cheeks. We began to move our body, lot's of heart openers, lots of movement. I found my edge quickly. I pushed through. Water by Kanye started playing. More tears. I leaned in, I let go, I kept moving.

This is my yoga.

By the end of the class I found peace, I was in alignment again.

Sometimes our intentions are one thing, we move forward, things change but it is as it is suppose to be. I was right where I needed to be. I know to trust my gut but sometimes the world is loud and will cause you to question the why, the details, and if you are doing the best right thing.

I have a lot of kids, who need me in different ways, and more at different times. Trying to juggle all the needs is hard, trusting your gut is the only way to survive parenting.

My physical yoga practice enables me to work through the white noise in my mind. As I open up my heart physically I let go of the attachments and expectations which enables me to release my own agenda, accept what is, and align with love.

This is my yoga.

Water by Kanye West

Chorus

Clean us like the rain in spring Take the chlorine out our conversation Let Your light reflect on me I promise I'm not hiding anything It's water We are water Pure as water Like a newborn daughter

The storm may come But we'll get through it because of Your love Either way, we crash like water Your love's water Pure as water We are water




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